The Labeling of Motherhood

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There’s this trend I have been noticing. Everyone needs to be labeled. It’s not enough to just be a mom. Now you need to know if you fit in with the crunchy moms, silky moms, unicorn moms, or one of the other many options.  Why are we so worried about these kinds of moms though? Is one really better than the other? Should we be labeling moms? 

What kind of mom are you?

Recently in a mom group on Facebook, I ran across a post asking what kind of mom everyone was.  It was set up as a poll so all the moms could choose which they would identify with the most, and the list of options was long. You could choose from:

  • Scrunchy
  • Crunchy
  • Silky
  • Sancti
  • Attachment
  • Helicopter
  • Authoritarian
  • Tiger
  • Unicorn
  • Martyr
  • etc

I looked at this list in shock.  I didn’t know what most of the options even meant, and it caused me to question different aspects of my motherhood journey.  Am I doing everything I can? Am I too much of a helicopter mom? Or should I be watching even closer? 

Is labeling moms like this even healthy?

After reflecting on what kind of mom I am, I really started to think about how unhealthy this is for moms.  So what if I’m a little crunchy, a little silky, a little unicorn and a little ________.

I will never be a mom who would fit securely inside one of those narrow boxes. Unapologetically, I do what I feel is right for my family.  If that makes me a little of each of these moms then so be it.  

When we spend our time labeling moms and trying to get them to fit inside these narrow boxes we miss out on so much of what makes us who we are. I don’t know about you, but I can see myself in most of those labels. However, if you were to just put me inside one of those boxes, you would be completely missing out on so many other parts of who I am. 

What would I label myself? 

I think if I was forced to choose I’d have to go with Unicorn Mom. Even though I hate the idea of labeling moms, there is one that seems most fitting, the Unicorn Mom.  According to Urban Dictionary, a unicorn mom is “A mother who’s not perfect, enjoys alcohol, has a sense of humor and couldn’t care less what you think.” 

I like that one.  I’m not perfect in any way, shape, or form. You can’t go wrong with a good drink, and unless I’m doing something legitimately stupid, I really don’t care what anyone thinks of the kind of mom I am.  

It’s like the Unicorn Mom is just the mom who is doing this whole motherhood thing the best way she knows how and that works best for her family.  I’m good with that. The last thing I would want to be known as is someone who is trying my all to fit inside one box. 

Who even cares?

This was the other question I had when I saw the poll. Who cares? Why does it matter? At the end of the day, will this make me a better mom? Will it teach me something? 

The answer is, it really doesn’t matter in any way. Me being Unicorn Mom and you being a _____ mom doesn’t mean we can’t have the same goals or wishes for our family. It just means we might find different ways to get there.  It also doesn’t guarantee that we have nothing in common. 

Motherhood is hard enough without the labels

There’s no reason we need to be labeled. Are you doing the best job you can? Are you the best mom you can be? Do you give your all to your family? Do you try to take some time to work on yourself? 

Then you’re an amazing mom! Keep doing you! 

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