Self-Care Mistakes You’re Making a Busy Mom
Self-care is something I discuss at length here on my blog, but what are the biggest self-care mistakes you’re making? None of us are perfect in our quest for more self-care. It’s something we all have to make a conscious effort to do, so we can’t expect perfection.
So, what mistakes are you making?
Mistake 1: Telling yourself you don’t have time
Yep, I’m starting here.
Telling yourself you don’t have time in your day is the biggest lie you can tell yourself. It is way too easy to look at all the things on your schedule and tell yourself that you just don’t have the time to take care of yourself. You can talk about how you need to do A, B, & C, but if you don’t take the time to make them a priority, then what good is that?
Being busy means that you need to be strategic with your time. Maybe instead of a full home spa session, today your self care is just putting on a little bit of mascara before you run out the door. Or maybe it’s putting on a top that’s a little more dressy than you need to wear, but it makes you feel amazing.
What you do for yourself doesn’t have to be big or extravagant. What will make you feel like your best self before you run out the door? Whatever it is, do it!
Maybe your morning is too crazy and you’re not able to add in 30 more seconds, then do something later in the day. Have your spouse watch the kids and keep them away so you can take a shower lasting longer than 2 minutes. You could take 5 minutes and paint your nails or do something you really love doing.
Don’t make the mistake of telling yourself you’re too busy. Sure, some days it may not happen, but frequently throughout the week, you need to be going the extra mile for yourself. Do something that makes you feel amazing. Go the extra mile for yourself. You deserve it.
Misatake 2: Thinking you’re being selfish
One of the biggest feelings moms deal with consistently is the feeling of guilt or that you’re being selfish for wanting something or to do something for yourself. This isn’t anywhere close to being true, and yet, it’s something we all do to ourselves.
I get it, I do the same thing. I by myself at $5 T-shirt and feel guilty because I could have spent that money on something for my daughter. Does that mean that I need the shirt less than her? Hell no! In fact, I probably could use it more than her because I don’t get a whole new wardrobe every few months.
Taking the time to do something for yourself is not selfish. Refilling your bucket so you can sprinkle love on your family and friends is never selfish. When we get burned out we have less we can give. Our tempers are shorter, we break down and cry more, we have harder times focusing on our family. When you take the time to fill your bucket, & take care of yourself, you become a better mom, wife, friend, coworker, and human.
You don’t need to be taking hours away from your family. Just take a little time for yourself and make yourself feel human again. Do so without feeling guilty or like you’re taking time (or money) away from your family. If you’re not going out and blowing the grocery budget for the month on things you want, and ignoring your
Mistake 3: Thinking it costs money
Sure, we’d all love a day at the spa, and giant shopping trips, but for most of us, that just isn’t a possibility, at least not on a regular basis. There are so many things you can do for yourself each day that will take you 5-10 minutes, some even less, and that will be fulfilling to yourself.
You don’t need to spend a ton of money on yourself to take care of yourself. As I mentioned above it could be as simple as putting on some mascara or your favorite shirt that makes you feel awesome. Doing little things throughout the day for yourself will help overall until you can do something bigger for yourself.
I have a great post *HERE* loaded with free ideas for you,
and this post *HERE* has over 100 ideas to use.
Mistake 4: Not making it a priority
Making your own self care a priority is so important to getting anywhere. If you constantly put yourself last and take your own needs off the priority list, then you’re only doing yourself a disservice. You need this time and deserve this time to take care of yourself and do something for yourself.
By making yourself a priority and setting that boundary in your life you are also setting an example for your kids that it is important to make sure your personal needs are met. Remember, you’re only taking a small, short part of your day to do something for yourself. You’re not neglecting your parental responsibilities for hours each day. You’re doing small, simple things that fill your heart and make you a better mom, wife, & human.
Work with your spouse to set up times that you can take a few minutes to yourself as well. After talking to my husband about feeling overwhelmed and needing a little time to decompress some days, he now knows that if I tell him I’m going in the room for a few that he is in charge and keep the pounding on the door to a minimum.
I can’t say I do anything extravagant when I lock myself away. Usually it’s putting in headphones in and dancing to music, or listening to a podcast. It is just a few minutes to connect with my true self before returning to be mommy some more.
Mistake 5: Purposely skipping self-care
Ok, sometimes we might have really good reasons for skipping it, but overall, we should not be skipping the time to take care of ourselves. We need to be making it a priority. Make it a time for zero excuses. Make your plan and stick to it.
You can plan it out ahead of time to go by a whim, as long as you’re taking time to do it. That’s the part that matters most. Put it on your calendar, work on a challenge, challenge your friends, do whatever needs done to make sure you’re keeping your needs met. You’ll be a better mother, wife, friend, or human for it.