You’re More Than Mom- One Year into This Self Care Journey
This is an exciting post for me to write. This week marks 1 year since I started Mommy Takes 5. In the last year, we have explored many aspects of why self care is necessary, and why it is a passion of mine. A big part of it is remembering that I’m more than mom. I am a woman who has her own needs, goals, passions, and desires. I started my self care journey before my blog, but the blog has definitely increased my intention behind taking time for myself each day.
From the moment we become mothers, whether our babies are ours by birth, foster care, or adoption, our world is tipped upside down. As of that moment, our entire world becomes about taking care of these little people put in our care. It becomes so easy to get lost in motherhood, and completely lose who you are outside of being a mom.
Mom Guilt is Real
One thing that I know we can all agree on is that the mom guilt is real. There’s no way around it, and honestly, I think social media makes it worse. We are constantly inundated with opinions on how to be the perfect mom, and when we fall short the mom guilt kicks in. From how or what we feed our babies, to whether or not we work, and even the time we spend on our own wants is criticized relentlessly on social media.
Part of being the best mom we can be is letting go of the guilt and allowing ourselves the grace to just be the mom we are by following our intuition. If you want to be the perfect mom to your kids, the best thing you can do is be perfectly yourself.
Showing our daughters that it’s healthy to do things to care for yourself is setting her up for a healthy relationship with herself later in her life. She will know that as things get hard she can focus on what she needs and bring herself back to a grounded state. Our sons will see and know that moms need time to be themselves and bring that into their marriages, encouraging their spouse to take time to be their own person.
The mom guilt we feel when locking ourselves in a room for a few minutes to have some time completely to ourselves is manufactured. When you start committing to focus on yourself you will find that many of the daily mom struggles wear you down less. You have more to give your family because you are taking the time to fill yourself.
The Journey Isn’t Easy
There are days where I just can’t find the time, or I get so distracted by other things that I put it off until I collapse in bed. We are all a work in progress. As we spend more time focusing on our needs it becomes easier to know exactly where you can fit time in, what you like to do that fills your heart the fastest, and what you need.
Taking a few moments throughout the day for yourself is paramount to your success. As I have experimented over the last year, I have found many places in my day that I can take a few moments for myself. This is beyond my daughter’s naps, and at bedtime. I take time throughout my days of working on my blog, posting on Facebook & Instagram, working for clients, maintaining my home, and caring for my daughter.
This blog is a big part of my self care, even though it is work, and takes time from my day. I am able to be creative and use skills from my former jobs to do it. It is something that helps me be more than mom. I am able to have a connection with other moms and put my passion into something beyond motherhood.
There are days I really struggle though. I don’t have the time to pamper myself every day. I’m a work at home mom, there are times clients need me for something big, or my daughter really needs mommy time. Through everything, my family comes first always. If my family’s needs are big, then just like anyone else, I push myself to the side and do what needs to be done first.
Getting the Husband on Board
Getting my husband to really understand what I needed from him took a little time. He is always supportive of me and behind me 100%, but I really had to be open about what I needed from him. I needed him to take over bedtime routines a couple days a week. I needed him to understand that if I disappeared into the bathroom or bedroom for 20 minutes after dinner that I just needed some time to breathe.
There are days where he will just see it on my face that I’m worn out and need a hand. There are also days where I’m screaming like a crazy lady and he doesn’t realize how bad I’m struggling. Throughout the days though, if I tell him I need a few moments to myself he will step in and let me just go relax for a bit. It’s not perfect, but it helps me to connect with my truest self.
One of My Favorite Ways to Reflect on Self Care
Through this journey of self care, I have realized that writing everything down and journaling about my experiences has helped me realize what is most effective in my life. I don’t use a fancy journal, although I will probably upgrade at some point, I just use a regular notebook I had on hand. Each day I write for a couple minutes about what I did, what worked, what didn’t, and what my goals are for myself.
To celebrate my first blogiversary I am giving you this free printable of journaling prompts for your own journey.
In the Year Ahead
In this next year of Mommy Takes 5, I will continue to share my story. I will continue on my journey while sharing with you. I have already begun to broaden my topics some by including a recipe for Snickerdoodles, and so far it has gotten a good response, so I will continue to share my favorite recipes with you. I also want to start reviewing more products that you can use in your self care routine.
I have some big plans for the upcoming year, and some big ideas I think you’ll love! So make sure you stay connected through social media or email so you don’t miss a thing. This is going to be a big year!